Something of an unfriending amnesty.

[panik]

I’ve been musing a lot on fandom of late – what it used to mean and what it means now. I’ve spent time over the weekend, talking about it with another old fandom-friend who feels much the same and think the time has come for me to bare my breast and bottom to the snowy wastes and admit that  my fandom glory days are probably past.

I’m still writing fic. I’ve actually been writing the same fic for over a year now (it’s very long!). I should finally finish that in the spring, but it’ll almost certainly be my last. I’m not saying that for sure, but the probability is very high. it’s just not where the love lies right now. I’m busy writing a new novel, all my creative energies are going into that and there really isn’t room for much else.

I only really have one fandom and that’s The Sentinel. Jim and Blair will always live in my head and heart but I don’t really want to write about them and only them any more. I haven’t watched an episode in a long time; I can’t seem to bring myself to engage in fandom discussions.

As for fandom in general, I’ve had half-hearted stabs at some of the other stuff around and I have to say that the shows creating the loudest squee on LJ right now do nothing for me at all. There are plenty of shows I enjoy, but nothing I feel fannish about, which is why I have to assume, like my Great-Fandom-Mate, who just took all her pix and posters down, that the fandom party is over for me - for now at least. Who can say what the future holds?
 
I’m not bowing out of fandom completely, but at best, I’m only going to be drifting on the margins. I’d guess most of the people on my flist friended me because of my fic or my website and that’s why I’m here, making this post, saying; if you feel we no longer have anything much in common and you don’t want to have to skip over me rambling on about my novel and my life, I won’t blame you one tiny little bit if you want to knock me off your Flist.

Likewise, I'm engaged in a little gentle pruning myself. With a few particular exceptions, I'm dropping people who never friended me back. For me, LJ is a mutual feast, a wonderful toing and froing and if you don't friend me back, we can't really engage. So, if you've found yourself dropped from my flist and want to stay, please friend me and I'll friend you back .

I’ve had fabulous times and made wonderful friends. Many, many people on LJ are now friends in every sense of the word. You know who you are; we might have come to know each other through fandom but that friendship has broadened into something far deeper. I haven’t actually met that many of you, but you’re better friends for the most part than the people I deal with in so-called real life.

But anyone who’s only been here for the fic and the fandom and who, in the light of all the above wants to go now, please feel free, with a hug and a blessing and a kiss to the cheek for auld lang syne.

It’s been great knowing every single one of you. XXX

Comments

[runriggers.livejournal.com]

Yes, I friended you because of your writing .... now that doesn't necessarily mean just your Sentinel writing. I enjoy your stories and I'll be interested in knowing about your novel and when it's published!!

I find I am not as into some of the fandoms as I was when I first joined lj. I started, if I remember, primarily for the Lord of the Rings fic and hardly read it anymore - same with Doctor Who. I'll still read that fic, but I'm not really into it any more, so it really depends on the authors.

Things change, lives change. I for one am not de-friending you.

[fluterbev.livejournal.com]

Heh, you and I are so much in accord that it is scary :-D

[miwahni.livejournal.com]

You know what? One day, when you least expect it, a fandom is going to jump out at you, kosh you and drag you into a dark alley, there to have its wicked way with you again. It may - or may not - be TS, but it will happen. Believe me. You THINK you've escaped fandom but it's like Hotel California; you can check out any time you like but you can never leave.
Fandom left me alone for a 19-year hiatus, before grabbing me by the throat and slamming me back up against the wall. Never been the same since, really.

[gillyp.livejournal.com]

Indeed. :o) I feel a bit sad actually because I'm moving on - which is always sad in itself - but my current pursuits are solitary things for the most part. I miss the camaraderie and all around lovin', the thrill of the squee that fandom brings - but there's no point in kidding myself anymore, I don;t think. The feeling's gone... ::resists urge to frighten everyone by bursting into song:: but you know what I mean.

::sighs a bit::

BTW, I believe there's a MH live over Easter, would you be up for that? Though it's Yvette and Karl-less apparently.

[miwahni.livejournal.com]

(PS not planning on going anywhere, either. I've enjoyed the snippets of your life, and you've introduced me to some absolute comic gold over the past year. So am staying, if all right with you.)

[gillyp.livejournal.com]

I'm delighted to have you still around. And who knows what the future might bring, hey? There might be fabulous fandom delights just around the next corner... :o)

[gillyp.livejournal.com]

I am delighted to have you here, honey. And you're right, fandom is a strange and wonderful phoenix-like thing. I hope something new comes along soon though, it's lonely out in no-man's land. :o(

[fluterbev.livejournal.com]

I would most certainly be up for that - I think my kids will be away then, though I will check. We can be cynical MH fangirls together! See, it ain't so lonely over here in the taking-the-piss camp \o/

[maaaaa.livejournal.com]

I'm a very sporadic commenter, but I'll stick around methinks.

It's sad to think your fandom squee is gone, but that's just from my perspective. It's where you are, so it's where you are.

Can I still have a hug and a kiss if I'm sticking around?? *g*

*smooch*

[janedavitt.livejournal.com]

Still here and I hope something catches your eye soon, but if not, no worries ::hugs::

[gillyp.livejournal.com]

Yay! Night vision cameras and EMF meters at the ready. We can send texts; 'when Stuart screamed, every spoon in my house bent double...'

[karieflybabe.livejournal.com]

*Digs in and sits tight for the ride.*

Because I KNOW you are not dropping me. I'll kick your arse if you try.

[gillyp.livejournal.com]

I'll hug n kiss anyone. I'm not called one of the doxies for nothing.

[gillyp.livejournal.com]

There's certainly nothing on the horizon right now. I'm still on the rebound too. :o)

[gillyp.livejournal.com]

Good to have you here, hon.

[fluterbev.livejournal.com]

I'm still waiting for you to bare your breast, as advertised above! ::whistles::

[vamysteryfan.livejournal.com]

I like reading about your work in progress. I may not always comment but watching the process unfold has been very enjoyable for me. Likewise the comments about England. SO keep me around, unless I become too boring for you.

::hugs::

[gillyp.livejournal.com]

I refer you to my previous comment re: frightening horses.

DoxieDoxieDoxie! ::is tellin Garett::

unless I become too boring for you.

[gillyp.livejournal.com]

you foolish young creature!

I'm glad my mindless ramblings haven't driven you away. I'm more than happy to have you around for as long as you want to be. :o)

[fluterbev.livejournal.com]

DoxieDoxieDoxie! ::is tellin Garett::

Garett knows ::nods sagely:: ;-)

[omphalos.livejournal.com]

As you know, I feel largely the same. Leaving an active fandom, for me, is rather like ending a once intense relationship, with both the sadness and relief that such a decision usually brings.

I'm glad we've got to know each other a little. Long may it continue. :)

[tx-cronopio.livejournal.com]

I got onto LJ via fandom, and now I am completely unfannish -- I don't know if it will ever come back or not. I feel bad, I know some of the writers on my friends list get hurt that I don't read their stuff more often.

In other words, I'm not going anywhere :)

[bumpkin-is.livejournal.com]

Fandom, to me that just means subject matter of the stories I read because the library can't keep me in books - I never really did get into all the extra fannish crap personally. It's always been about fiction for me, original or not. Heh, so I guess as you can imagine I friended you because you were a writer - not just of Sentinel stuff but original works - that and I like reading the blurbs you drop just about whatever. :)

Well...

[gillyp.livejournal.com]

There's more than a little of the doxie about Garett, too.

[gillyp.livejournal.com]

Our own little gang of satellites, trickling along here on the edge of fandom, watching the madness, havin' a laugh. *g*

Good to have you as a friend. ::chinks glasses::

[gillyp.livejournal.com]

I feel baddest of all, that I'm not really reading much fic at the moment; being very selective I am and - I do feel bad that I don;t comment on everyone's fic but I just don't have the energy anymore, you know?

Glad to have y'aboard. We fly under the flag of no fandom; let us all be scurvy fandom-free dogs together. ::raises cutlass, laughs a bit for no good reason::

[gillyp.livejournal.com]

And right glad I am that you're here.

I'm not dropping out of fandom altogether, just backing away a it and hanging round the edges for a bit.

[aerianya.livejournal.com]

Fandom (my one and only) may have brought us together, but that was just one mutual interest. You are far to interesting and lovely to un-friend because you aren't as involved. Actually neither am I, but I still find a story to read and an icon or whatever to make.
The TS love still exists but it's like an established relationship, fellowship may be lacking somewhat sometimes, but the love is still there and as strong as ever. Maybe not as passionate and time consuming just comfortable and reliable.

[snycock.livejournal.com]

Hah! You're not getting rid of me THAT easily! I'm hanging around, and possibly coming to your house again, and eating all your crumpets, and drinking all your red wine...

No, but seriously, all kidding aside, one of the best parts of fandom for me has been all the incredibly wonderful people I've come to know. I never imagined, when I made that first tentative post on the Temple boards, that a short time later I'd find myself with friends all over the globe, much less actually getting to meet them!

I hope you find something - whatever it may be - to pump up your squee soon, and until then I'll happily hang around, because I love hearing about Entanglement and Withnell and British TV and your other non-fanfic writing and your general life.

[therentgirls.livejournal.com]

I'll stay, thanks. ;>

[betagoddess.livejournal.com]

I'm sure I first friended you because of your wonderful writing in the TS fandom, but since then, having gotten to know you, I consider you a friend and am always interested in your RL toing and froing - your photos, your novel, your renovations and all. =>}

If you can put up with my Grandmotherly posts and the like, I am more than happy to stay on your LJ flist. *g*

I love fandom and I'm pretty much addicted to slash, but they're only one facet of my life.

[luicat.livejournal.com]

::smooches::

[jessriley.livejournal.com]

You're stuck with me baby. :0)

Sorry to hear that you are feeling this way, but completely understand where you are coming from. Nothing stays the same forever!

[mab-browne.livejournal.com]

I've always enjoyed the people connection as well as the fannish connection, so I have no trouble sticking around for the day to day stuff. :-)

[snailbones.livejournal.com]

Did I miss the bare boobs and bottom? Drat!

You'll have to wear a fake beard and hide in the bushes to get rid of me babe.

::snogs you::

[banbury.livejournal.com]

The friendship is always the most precious thing among others in our life, and I like to think that the best part of all my passions is my friends :-) and I hope even when we can grow out of old love it's still a big part of us, of what we are ;-)

[xnitelite.livejournal.com]

Personally, I plan on sticking around. Can't get rid of me that easily. *g*

Best of luck with your new novel!

[shiredancer.livejournal.com]

I'm here for the duration if you'll have me! After all, you're my supplier of Dr. Who Wisdom (I'm still only up to the third doctor in my historical review), and you keep the British fire burning in my heart... er, hearth... well, something poetical like that.

[jadebear07.livejournal.com]

Hey Gilly,

Though I'll miss your wonderful stories, I'm simply happy to still have you around. Fandom is amazing in that it is so much more than the show that started it. I haven't been around here much myself, trying to wrestle RL into something manageable, but I'm always thrilled to get back on LJ just to see all of the wonderful people I've met because of The Sentinel. Very happy to know you'll still be here. All my best spiritual chocolate your way and I can't wait to hear how your novel is coming! Take care!

JB:)

[klangley56.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I had a conversation with a fandom friend (well, more accurately--a friend, who also happens to be in fandom), about whether we thought we'd still be doing the fandom thing a few years down the line. I've been in fandom a few years longer than she has, and it can only go so far, yes?

That conversation took place 33 years ago.

Never say never. :-)