a sister who was abducted and murdered at the age of 8.

Oh lord, how awful... and I know what you mean about the matter of factness - my family all seemed to accept what to me was great tragedy like it was nothing much, just the way life was. Maybe that was the only way to survive it.

It's great that your research is jogging your dad's memory... and keep up the good work with the mince pies - you're making me feel less guilty *g*