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Eurovision Thoughts. A running commentary.
Bosnia Herzegovina: OK, quite liked this one. NIce.
Spain: Good looking little boy band, very lively. Can take or leave the song but the eye candy - douze points. I would guess these boys are more than good friends.
Belarus: Dear God...!
Ireland: Man! National steroetype, anyone? I used to despise Johnny Logan's sacharine sentimentality but at least he had the good grace to forego wearing a green hat and a shamrock. Dull, dull dull... what a disappointment!
Finland: OK, clearly going with a winning formula. I used to dress like that in 1983. Hey, there's nothing wrong with a little retro.
A strange interlude with the audience... They are all Fins; why are they speaking English to each other? Dear God, it's so very distressing when they start trying to be cool.
And back to the music...
Macedonia: I have no words.
And what on Earth is up with the Slovenian chick? Is this Ride of the Valkyries? ::whimper::
Hungary: Ooh, wow! Cool and lounge-singery. Interesting choice; won't win of course, but as Uncle Terry says 'a nice rest from all the bellowing'
Lithuania: Very nice! Rather like Cuban 'New music' - very Pablo Milanes.
Greece: Ooh; nice boy, forgettable song.
Georgia: Very Bjorkish, I thought. rather good. No chance of a win, but I liked it.
Sweden: Sweden: Look and sound like the Sweet meets the Crow. Sadly average. I have no words for how much I hated it.
France: Have revived the spirit of Plastique Bertrand. Not bad. Not great.
Latvia: Gosh. Men in top hats. Very epic.
OK, Russia's coming on...
Updating all the time here... <G>
Russia: Well, that's your winner, right there.
Germany: Man... Has the spirit of the lounge lizard swept mittel Europe? I like it, like it very much, though I doubt if it'll get the Minsk vote.
Serbia: Ooh get her with her trendy Morrissey specs and histronics. Nul points from the Chorley jury. (o: - Ooh, the crowd is cheering, they think it's all over... It is now. Thank God.
Ukraine!!! Yay, I've been waiting all night for this. Divine lives and is singing in a Bavarian gay bar! Oh, I think Russia's got a run for her money here. ::so hopes this one wins::
Oh no... It's the UK. Oh dear God. ::hangs head in shame:: OTOH, this is so bad, it might actually stand a chance of some points. Maybe not... Kill me now.
The Romanians are at a Jewish wedding. The UK was bad, this is much, much worse.
Holy shit! What is Bulgaria on and where can I get some? This is actually really good! It would sound fantastishe with a good techno mix.
Turkey: Yawn.
Armenia: Double yawn. At least the Turks had belly-dancers, even if they were all British. Oh God, please make it end! (LOL! And Uncle Tel asks; 'Flesh wound was it?' Bwahahahaha!)
Moldova: Oh dear. Only twelve bars in and I can tell this is going to be piss-poor... Man. That was B.A.D. (Tel: 'I only hope her mother wasn't watching that. that was quite frightening.)
My favourites, Lithuania, Georgia, Ukraine and Bulgaria, but my money's on a shoot out between Russia and Ukraine, and they hate each other! Wars have started over less. (o:
Oh baby. This Finnish chick is killing me with her sheer awfulness. She is made of BAD. I want her killed and I want it now. (Tel: "Hard to know what to say without bursting into tears. I've met some of these people and they're much worse than you'd think.")
Do they HAVE to keep repeating the songs? Wasn't once enough, for God's sake. Have SOME mercy!
You know, when Terry Wogan (Bow down and worship Him.) retires from this show, it will become an unbearable ordeal. OTOH... Russell Brand... Jonathan Ross... Ricky Gervais? Is Terry replaceable? You can't help but wonder.
Oh dear, the mid-show pause-for-voting horror. The bubble boy scared me terribly. It's all a bit too Cirque du Soleil for me. ::wibble:: And the Finn is just making me angry, now. I want her to stop. I need her killed and I need her killed NOW.
What was the Finnish guy called; Servius Stockbroker was it? Crazy name, crazy guy!
Here we go, with them all voting for their friends - and former enemies. Sheesh, this gets me down. At least the Finnish audience are having the good taste to Boo! Loudly! Good for them!
So why is Turkey getting so many votes? It was HORRIBLE!
And the Danes have given Sweden 12 points. Why am I not surprised? I guess it's an antidote to all that Eastern Bloc voting. ::roll::
The Greeks have given Bulgaria 12 points! Yes! I always knew the Greeks had the best taste. (o:
Serbia have given Bosnia-Herzegovina eight points. It doesn't make up for what you did, you know...
Oh no. Another 12 points for Serbia??? What on Earth is going on?
Cyprus gave Greece 12 points. Oh man. And Croatia up next. Any surprises...? Bosnia-H; 10 points. 12 to Serbia. This is just so sad.
Well, I admit it; it's not going the way I anticipated at all! The partisan voting is killing this year - the audience is getting ugly; there'll be blood on the carpet before the night is over. Mind you, they've no need to be smug, they gave 12 points to Sweden, as did Denmark.
I've lost the will to live. And I miss Katie Boyle so much.
Slovenia. Well, they have a sense of humour at least. Another 12 points to Serbia? I just don't get it, it was awesome in it's tedium.
OK, Israel. This should be interesting. 12 to Belarus? O:
And the UK is still nul points. Hee!!!!!!!!!!!! Just behind Lithuania who had a genuinely good song.
Norway thinks Helsinki have 'rocked the world tonight'. They clearly don't get out much. And they've given Sweden 12 points... Man...You need drugs to get through this show.
Oh God. Serbia are going to win! Do they realise how much this show costs to put on? It'll bankrupt the poor buggers.
Dear oh dear. The Dutch are always a little OTT in their desire to be such wild and crazy guys.
OK, the friends-only voting just turned in our favour. The UK got Seven points from Ireland!! Bless them! We are saved from the ignominy of nul points (and they gave 12 points to Lithuania! Excellent!). And douze points from Malta! Bless their partisan little cotton socks! (Hee. This gets sillier and sillier and sillier. Even Terry is losing his sense of humour).
Oh baby! I predicted the Latvian votes. And Iceland's, too. Oh this is stupid, stupid, stupid. I'm now totally predicting where the votes will go and getting it right every time. The booing in the audience has to be heard to be believed!. I wouldn't mind betting there'll be some kind of outcry/inquiry later. I've kinda gone beyond irritated and into mildly angry now.
OK, the UK have just given Greece 10 points and Turkey 12. I'm totally at a loss.
And Serbia have won. What a senseless act of madness. And Ireland came last! O: OK, I thought it was tedious but it was a bloody sight better than Serbia and Turkey's entries.
::is at a loss:: Hey, it's Eurovision. What was I expecting?
And we get to hear the song again! Eventually. If Santa will stop kissing the girl. He clearly thinks he's in with a chance. I don't think so, Grandad! I just get the feeling that girl doesn't swing that way.
Ah well. Three hours and twenty minutes I'll never get back. I'm off to bed. Don't have nightmares...
Spain: Good looking little boy band, very lively. Can take or leave the song but the eye candy - douze points. I would guess these boys are more than good friends.
Belarus: Dear God...!
Ireland: Man! National steroetype, anyone? I used to despise Johnny Logan's sacharine sentimentality but at least he had the good grace to forego wearing a green hat and a shamrock. Dull, dull dull... what a disappointment!
Finland: OK, clearly going with a winning formula. I used to dress like that in 1983. Hey, there's nothing wrong with a little retro.
A strange interlude with the audience... They are all Fins; why are they speaking English to each other? Dear God, it's so very distressing when they start trying to be cool.
And back to the music...
Macedonia: I have no words.
And what on Earth is up with the Slovenian chick? Is this Ride of the Valkyries? ::whimper::
Hungary: Ooh, wow! Cool and lounge-singery. Interesting choice; won't win of course, but as Uncle Terry says 'a nice rest from all the bellowing'
Lithuania: Very nice! Rather like Cuban 'New music' - very Pablo Milanes.
Greece: Ooh; nice boy, forgettable song.
Georgia: Very Bjorkish, I thought. rather good. No chance of a win, but I liked it.
Sweden: Sweden: Look and sound like the Sweet meets the Crow. Sadly average. I have no words for how much I hated it.
France: Have revived the spirit of Plastique Bertrand. Not bad. Not great.
Latvia: Gosh. Men in top hats. Very epic.
OK, Russia's coming on...
Updating all the time here... <G>
Russia: Well, that's your winner, right there.
Germany: Man... Has the spirit of the lounge lizard swept mittel Europe? I like it, like it very much, though I doubt if it'll get the Minsk vote.
Serbia: Ooh get her with her trendy Morrissey specs and histronics. Nul points from the Chorley jury. (o: - Ooh, the crowd is cheering, they think it's all over... It is now. Thank God.
Ukraine!!! Yay, I've been waiting all night for this. Divine lives and is singing in a Bavarian gay bar! Oh, I think Russia's got a run for her money here. ::so hopes this one wins::
Oh no... It's the UK. Oh dear God. ::hangs head in shame:: OTOH, this is so bad, it might actually stand a chance of some points. Maybe not... Kill me now.
The Romanians are at a Jewish wedding. The UK was bad, this is much, much worse.
Holy shit! What is Bulgaria on and where can I get some? This is actually really good! It would sound fantastishe with a good techno mix.
Turkey: Yawn.
Armenia: Double yawn. At least the Turks had belly-dancers, even if they were all British. Oh God, please make it end! (LOL! And Uncle Tel asks; 'Flesh wound was it?' Bwahahahaha!)
Moldova: Oh dear. Only twelve bars in and I can tell this is going to be piss-poor... Man. That was B.A.D. (Tel: 'I only hope her mother wasn't watching that. that was quite frightening.)
** ** **
And on with the voting. Always good for a laugh. My favourites, Lithuania, Georgia, Ukraine and Bulgaria, but my money's on a shoot out between Russia and Ukraine, and they hate each other! Wars have started over less. (o:
Oh baby. This Finnish chick is killing me with her sheer awfulness. She is made of BAD. I want her killed and I want it now. (Tel: "Hard to know what to say without bursting into tears. I've met some of these people and they're much worse than you'd think.")
Do they HAVE to keep repeating the songs? Wasn't once enough, for God's sake. Have SOME mercy!
You know, when Terry Wogan (Bow down and worship Him.) retires from this show, it will become an unbearable ordeal. OTOH... Russell Brand... Jonathan Ross... Ricky Gervais? Is Terry replaceable? You can't help but wonder.
Oh dear, the mid-show pause-for-voting horror. The bubble boy scared me terribly. It's all a bit too Cirque du Soleil for me. ::wibble:: And the Finn is just making me angry, now. I want her to stop. I need her killed and I need her killed NOW.
** ** **
The Voting! The Voting!!!What was the Finnish guy called; Servius Stockbroker was it? Crazy name, crazy guy!
Here we go, with them all voting for their friends - and former enemies. Sheesh, this gets me down. At least the Finnish audience are having the good taste to Boo! Loudly! Good for them!
So why is Turkey getting so many votes? It was HORRIBLE!
And the Danes have given Sweden 12 points. Why am I not surprised? I guess it's an antidote to all that Eastern Bloc voting. ::roll::
The Greeks have given Bulgaria 12 points! Yes! I always knew the Greeks had the best taste. (o:
Serbia have given Bosnia-Herzegovina eight points. It doesn't make up for what you did, you know...
Oh no. Another 12 points for Serbia??? What on Earth is going on?
Cyprus gave Greece 12 points. Oh man. And Croatia up next. Any surprises...? Bosnia-H; 10 points. 12 to Serbia. This is just so sad.
** ** **
Well, I admit it; it's not going the way I anticipated at all! The partisan voting is killing this year - the audience is getting ugly; there'll be blood on the carpet before the night is over. Mind you, they've no need to be smug, they gave 12 points to Sweden, as did Denmark.
I've lost the will to live. And I miss Katie Boyle so much.
** ** **
Slovenia. Well, they have a sense of humour at least. Another 12 points to Serbia? I just don't get it, it was awesome in it's tedium.
OK, Israel. This should be interesting. 12 to Belarus? O:
And the UK is still nul points. Hee!!!!!!!!!!!! Just behind Lithuania who had a genuinely good song.
Norway thinks Helsinki have 'rocked the world tonight'. They clearly don't get out much. And they've given Sweden 12 points... Man...You need drugs to get through this show.
Oh God. Serbia are going to win! Do they realise how much this show costs to put on? It'll bankrupt the poor buggers.
Dear oh dear. The Dutch are always a little OTT in their desire to be such wild and crazy guys.
OK, the friends-only voting just turned in our favour. The UK got Seven points from Ireland!! Bless them! We are saved from the ignominy of nul points (and they gave 12 points to Lithuania! Excellent!). And douze points from Malta! Bless their partisan little cotton socks! (Hee. This gets sillier and sillier and sillier. Even Terry is losing his sense of humour).
Oh baby! I predicted the Latvian votes. And Iceland's, too. Oh this is stupid, stupid, stupid. I'm now totally predicting where the votes will go and getting it right every time. The booing in the audience has to be heard to be believed!. I wouldn't mind betting there'll be some kind of outcry/inquiry later. I've kinda gone beyond irritated and into mildly angry now.
OK, the UK have just given Greece 10 points and Turkey 12. I'm totally at a loss.
** ** **
And Serbia have won. What a senseless act of madness. And Ireland came last! O: OK, I thought it was tedious but it was a bloody sight better than Serbia and Turkey's entries.
::is at a loss:: Hey, it's Eurovision. What was I expecting?
And we get to hear the song again! Eventually. If Santa will stop kissing the girl. He clearly thinks he's in with a chance. I don't think so, Grandad! I just get the feeling that girl doesn't swing that way.
Ah well. Three hours and twenty minutes I'll never get back. I'm off to bed. Don't have nightmares...
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Oh heck. It's us. We are so bad. So very bad. It ought to be illegal to be this poor.
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Oh man. Bulgaria... ::is speechless::
TBH, I *really* like it. I hope it wins!!!
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The Turkish belly dancers are all *British* according to Uncle Tel. What a let down.
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Oh oh Serbia and the prison warders
Too much choice!
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You know, I really fancy that Bulgarian entry, it stands no chance, of course.
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