panik | Blue

I've posted Blue. Here it is.

- Only to 852 at the moment (and yes, it's riddled with the inevitable glitches, why can't I ever get it right? Why?!) but soon to ASR3, I hope and also a new website (coming soon).

I started writing Blue 2 years ago when 20 people contributed $10 to watch this monster get written on a private LJ com, with another 5 getting their updates by email.

betagoddess ,

fluterbev ,

luicat ,

snycock ,

slipperieslope ,

shiredancer ,

lear1027 ,

t_verano ,

patk ,

earth2skye ,

tany_z ,

alibongo ,

suemc ,

monkeyfun1 ,

debmc ,

still_ra ,jazzybea47 ,

juneb ,

artemis54 and

ponders_life on LJ. Also Mariojoe, Terry O'Donnell, Gloria Ainsworth, Cynthia and the lovely Gerri - who have all been so generous with their comment and suggestions and have greatly added to the story and I thank them all.

Special thanks to the magnificent

runriggers for one of the most rapid betas I've ever had, ever!

If you're planning to read it, be warned it's 126,000 words long and it's angsty. You would expect it to be, I suppose, angst is my MO, but Blue is mega-angst of galactic proportions. I didn't intend it to be quite so very packed with pain, it was sort of an accident. Sorry.

It's slash but in its very mildest forms. There's nothing much there, really, that would mither even the terribly sensitive.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

You really weren't kidding about the angst, were you? It was uber-angsty, yet very satisfying. Too bad Simon turned out to be such a schmuck. Jim, too, come to think of it. I love that Blair became a Robin Hood/Batman of sorts, taking on injustice in such a big way. So glad I read the whole thing at once, though - I would have DIED having all those cliffhangers!

Don't say schmuck! :o) You know, I think Simon was just terminally disappointed; he'd such high hopes for the partnership and so much belief in Blair and - the way he saw it - Blair let them all down. Simon was one character I really did feel I should have gone back and dealt with but it was getting so long and there were too many loose ends to tie them all up satisfactorily so I just concentrated on Jim and Blair and their part of the story.

As for Jim - gosh, not a schmuck at all I hope. If you think that then I failed utterly! Jim was just as wounded as Blair in his way, it just wasn't so visible because of his professional success, and that he'd healed his relationships with his dad and brother, but inside, he was as broken as Blair. The hints are all over the earlier chapters and very much so in the last letter to Blair and what comes after.

Owl was a very strong image for me the whole time I was writing. He really is based on L'Hibou. I watched a French TV drama about L'Hibou and the French Revolution years ago that I loved and that character has always stayed with me. I wanted to write a story with Blair as Owl for a long time and that image was the germ of the whole thing.

I'm glad you liked it - hope you liked it(?) The angst is pretty fierce, I know. I didn't plan it that way, it just kinda happened :o)

Thanks so much for reading (and so quickly, because that thing is long!)

Blue

no subject

Not schmuck!